Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Things that we don't speak of


I had a wonderful conversation with some friends last night.  What was the topic?  Sex.  It was amazing!  Thinking about it now we are all at different points of our life.  I am married, one girl is getting married in 4 days, and the other is in a dating relationship.  Now for context we are all christians and went to BSSM together so we all have the same view of sex and marriage.

But we got to openly discuss sex, not in a awkward or perverted way but open and honest.  Expectations and Connection.  What the church and our families had told us about sex.  What our culture, generation and hollywood tells us (which for the most part is all wrong).  I won't go into the same discussions we had since I don't know where all of you are at, but here are some of the key points we hit.

The church doesn't talk about sex (for the most part, I know several have finally begun to talk about) except to tell us it's only for marriage, don't do it, it's bad.
Family (again not all) doesn't talk about sex, it's awkward.  Plus most of us don't want to admit our parents had sex except to conceive us.
So who does that leave to teach us and our children about sex?  When we(the church) don't take the wonderful opportunity to teach about sex guess who takes that opportunity!  Is it any wonder the our culture is so engrossed in sexuality?  How and when did you learn about sex?
The great thing was that all three of us agreed that we want to teach our children (when we have them) about sex, in a healthy way.  Not mystifying it or making it taboo.  But explaining the wonderful gift and treasure it is.  Joe and I are already praying for God to give us wisdom in when and how to explain it to our kids (no, no baby news yet)

For more thoughts on this topic I would recomend Kris Vallotton's book "Purity: The New Moral Revolutoin"  it's amazing!  

I would love to hear your thoughts on this topic!

2 comments:

Baby Paige said...

I have been thinking about this very topic a lot lately. Sex should be celebrated in the church - discussed as the blessing it is. When we show how beautiful it is in the context that God made it, it makes people not want to sell themselves short. It helps us to want to preserve the marriage bed and keep ourselves pure. When we say it's bad or avoid it, and then the world says it's great and no big deal, we lose out. We are opted out of the conversation and lose almost an entire generation. Believers end up in unholy relationships, bad situations, suffering from guilt and shame, and isolated from God, We need to approach this subject with truth and love. We need to show it for what it is - a fabulous gift for 2 people to share to enhance their intimacy and bring the blessing of children. But also, the truth of the fact that out of God's plan it brings pain, heartache and shame.

Jenna said...

Sex is more than good. It's powerful. Love you meg! we will do dinner soon with Sara.